What if? The main problem with having Tuesdays and Wednesdays off is that Monday, being my Friday it is very difficult to find people who want to go to the bar with me. Except other people who work with me, and that never turns out to be fun. We always end up torching a bank.
My vet seems to think that it may be a good idea to put my cat on some kind of cat downer. Like a cat Valium, really, it's made by the same people. I asked him about the possibility of addiction, and he looked at me funny and said "Well, now, Kim, Dakota is a cat." Like that explains it all. And then how am I to support my own alcoholism and his drug habit at the same time? It would progress to a point where we would lie on the floor all day arguing about "who lost the dream first", then I'll drag him up to work and duct tape my headset to his head to show him how the other half lives. I'll collapse in the parking lot after walking through a plate glass window. I'll end up in a padded room somewhere and Dakota will enter rehab and tour the country making speeches about the dangers of drug use. And then the bank I work for will lose a bunch of customers who don't feel comfortable doing business with a company who employs cats. We do, after all, live in a rather conservative part of the country.
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"All things considered, fat people just use more soap."
